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Gray, Arthur Herbert, 1868-1956

"Men Women and God"

It has, as a matter of fact, a good many other
consequences than the production of children. It constitutes a bond of
very great worth between two persons. It is in many interesting ways
beneficial to a woman's physical system; and it brings to men a general
balance and repose of being which is of enormous value. I believe, in
fact, that in actual experience it does justify itself as a method
of expressing affection.
The alternative for thousands of couples is not merely the cessation of
sexual intimacy, but also abstinence from all the endearing intimacies
which are natural and spontaneous in married life. They must not only
sleep apart, but in many ways live apart. And this not only means pain
of heart such as would take a very great deal to justify it, but also
often leads to serious nervous trouble because of the strain which it
involves. I have insisted again and again in these pages that
continence is perfectly possible for unmarried men. But continence for
a man living in the same house with a woman whom he loves, and with
whom he has had experience of sexual intimacy, is a very different
thing.


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