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Gray, Arthur Herbert, 1868-1956

"Men Women and God"


There are times when a woman cannot respond, and a true husband must
learn to recognize such times. Some of them are perfectly obvious. When
a woman is not well, or is fatigued--when pregnancy has advanced beyond
its early stages--when full health has not been recovered after
childbirth--at these and at other times the conditions are not present
for a true sexual experience, and in the name of his love a man must
learn not to ask for what cannot be freely given.
None the less it is not always and only the husbands who make mistakes
in this part of life. A woman must be at least willing to be awakened
and made responsive, and many women have a strange power of controlling
themselves in this matter. They can repress their natures even when
desire has begun to stir. They can remain cold at will. And they do
it for many and varied reasons. Sometimes their reasons are purely
selfish--they cannot or will not be bothered. Sometimes they allow a
sense of pique over some trifling grievance to inhibit their natural
instincts. Sometimes because they shrink from the labors of motherhood
they acquire a distaste for this whole side of married life.


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