But till we have learnt to repudiate
that suggestion we are not even on the way to succeed in this part of
life. Often the men who defend such indulgences admit that they are
gross, and then fall back upon the contention that a man _must_ be
gross at times--that his nature demands it. It is a fairly serious
slander to offer to our sex. Fortunately there exist thousands of
incarnate proofs that it is _only_ a slander. We all know that his
sexual nature sets the ordinary healthy man a very serious problem, and
about that I have tried to speak with sympathy and charity in a later
chapter. But the assertion that a man _must_ be gross is hard
to hear with patience. It is one of the lies that savor of cowardice.
By "wildness," however, men sometimes mean temporary intimate relations
between men and women to which they _are_ led by love, and such
relationships are at least very different in moral quality from the
gross ones I have spoken of.
Why must they be condemned? My whole contention is that love and love
alone makes physical intimacy pure and right.
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