About a dozen times putting
through the pea and water process cured them.
So says the very respectable Mr. Choicewest, with great dignity of
manners, as he seriously advises the younger Choicewest to try a
little quantity of the same sort on his now useless female purchase.
Lady Choicewest must, however, be consulted on this point, as she is
very particular about the mode in which all females about her
establishment are chastised. Indeed, Lady Choicewest is much
concerned about the only male, heir of the family, to whom she looks
forward for very distinguished results to the family name. The
family (Lady Choicewest always assures those whom she graciously
condescends to admit into the fashionable precincts of her small but
very select circle), descended from the very ancient and chivalric
house of that name, whose celebrated estate was in Warwickshire,
England; and, in proof of this, my Lady Choicewest invariably points
to a sad daub, illustrative of some incomprehensible object,
suspended over the antique mantelpiece. With methodical grace, and
dignity which frowns with superlative contempt upon every thing very
vulgar--for she says "she sublimely detests them very low creatures
what are never brought up to manners at the north, and are worse
than haystacks to larn civility"--my lady solicits a near inspection
of this wonderful hieroglyphic, which she tells us is the family
arms,--an ancient and choice bit of art she would not part with for
the world.
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