The telling of faults may
be safely left to hostile critics, and to what Sheridan calls
"damned good-natured" acquaintances. But the friend must take for
granted that his friend desires, in a general way, what is good and
true, even though he may pursue it on different lines. One's duty
is to encourage and believe in one's friend, not to disapprove of
and to censure him. One loves him for what he is, not for what he
might be if he would only take one's advice. The point is that it
must be all a free gift, not a mutual improvement society--unless
indeed that is the basis of the compact. After all, a man can only
feel responsible to God. One goes astray, no doubt, like a sheep
that is lost; but it is not the duty of another sheep to butt one
back into the right way, unless indeed one appeals for help. One
may have pastors and directors, but they can never be equal
friends. If there is to be superiority in friendship, the lesser
must willingly crown the greater; the greater must not ask to be
crowned. The secure friendship is that which begins in comradeship,
and moves into a more generous and emotional region.
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