The main reason probably is that we acquire a point of
view, and it is easier to keep to that, and fit people in who
accommodate themselves to it, than to modify the point of view with
reference to the new personalities. People who deal with life
generously and large-heartedly go on multiplying relationships to
the end.
Of course, as I have said, there are infinite grades of friendship,
beginning with the friendship which is a mere camaraderie arising
out of habit and proximity; and every one ought to be capable of
forming this last relationship. The modest man, said Stevenson,
finds his friendships ready-made; by which he meant that if one is
generous, tolerant, and ungrudging, then, instead of thinking the
circle in which one lives inadequate, confined, and unsympathetic,
one gets the best out of it, and sees the lovable side of ordinary
human beings. Such friendships as these can evoke perhaps the best
and simplest kind of loyalty. It is said that in countries where
oxen are used for ploughing in double harness, there are touching
instances of an ox pining away, and even dying, if he loses his
accustomed yoke-fellow.
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