_Anonymous_.
THE SUNBEAM
I dined with a friend in the East, one day,
Who had no window-sashes;
A sunbeam through the window came
And burnt his wife to ashes.
"John, sweep your mistress away," said he,
"And bring fresh wine for my friend and me."
_Anonymous_.
LITTLE WILLIE
Little Willie hung his sister,
She was dead before we missed her.
"Willie's always up to tricks!
Ain't he cute? He's only six!"
_Anonymous_.
MARY AMES
Pity now poor Mary Ames,
Blinded by her brother James;
Red-hot nails in her eyes he poked,--
I never saw Mary more provoked.
_Anonymous_.
MUDDLED METAPHORS
_By a Moore-ose Melodist_
Oh, ever thus from childhood's hour,
I've seen my fondest hopes recede!
I never loved a tree or flower
That didn't trump its partner's lead.
I never nursed a dear gazelle,
To glad me with its dappled hide,
But when it came to know me well,
It fell upon the buttered side.
I never taught a cockatoo
To whistle comic songs profound,
But, just when "Jolly Dogs" it knew,
It failed for ninepence in the pound.
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