I suspect their opinion will be found to
coincide with that of the public; at least it is not very different
from my own. The blow is a stunning one, I suppose, for I scarcely
feel it. It is singular, but it comes with as little surprise as if I
had a remedy ready; yet God knows I am at sea in the dark, and the
vessel leaky, I think, into the bargain. I cannot conceive that I have
tied a knot with my tongue which my teeth cannot untie. We shall see.
I have suffered terribly, that is the truth, rather in body than mind,
and I often wish I could lie down and sleep without waking. But I will
fight it out if I can."[58] The medical men with one accord tried to
make him give up his novel-writing. But he smiled and put them by. He
took up _Count Robert of Paris_ again, and tried to recast it. On the
18th May he insisted on attending the election for Roxburghshire, to
be held at Jedburgh, and in spite of the unmannerly reception he had
met with in March, no dissuasion would keep him at home. He was
saluted in the town with groans and blasphemies, and Sir Walter had to
escape from Jedburgh by a back way to avoid personal violence.
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