As the day wore on and he recovered in some
measure his self-control, he began to view the situation in a different
light from that in which it had first appeared to him, although, in
strict adherence to fact, he could not be said to have viewed it in any
light at all in that first hour or two. It was all dense darkness to
him, a black despair not unmingled with anger and a sense of injury. But
as he sat alone in his room with its windows looking out over the
desert, his naturally confident and optimistic spirit gradually asserted
itself. Again and again, and each time more positively, he assured
himself that all was not lost yet by any means. He had been unfortunate
enough, yes, and fool enough, to make a bad break; a break that he, with
all of his experience, should have known better than to make to any
woman. Yet he felt that, even admitting that, he could not justly blame
himself. The Pearl had not only surprised but frightened him by the way
she had taken a fact which he thought she fully understood--that
marriage was out of the question for him. He was so crazy about her
that he had lost his head, that was the long and short of the matter,
and had made a fool of himself and hash of the situation; but
temporarily, only temporarily. For, and to this belief he clung more and
more hopefully, the Pearl was too deeply in love with him definitely to
close the affair between them for just one break. He would not, could
not believe that. It was true enough that he had aroused her passionate
and violent anger, but the more violent the anger the sooner it will
evaporate, and strange and complex as the Pearl was, she was yet a
woman; and no woman on earth could long hold resentment against the man
she loved.
Pages:
93
94
95
96
97
98
99
100
101
102
103
104
105
106
107
108
109
110
111
112
113
114
115
116
117